Tag: love

To adore her

by surfchickareta, posted in attention, childbirth, children, conscious living, exploration, giving, health, healthy living, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, mindfulness, pregnancy, relationships, selfless

There are no heroes, only two lovers navigating their way through unchartered waters. Ever present, is this energetic undertow of a once unbreakable closeness. A closeness often tested to its ultimate limits, through the choppy and messy ocean that is new parenthood. 

We toy with softer ways to communicate all those needs that suddenly arise with the arrival of this tiny baby, for we know harsh words can cut deep into our tender minds. Words that return to the memory, in the stillness of another sleepless night. 

As caffeine floods my system, I remind myself to find all those little ways to adore her, because I’m certain that any cliche must be true. Enjoy it while it lasts, for time will go so fast. Whispers from passing strangers, almost as frequent as I change her.

pregnancy

The tired mind struggles to judge the distance between events. The concept of time itself, completely twisted and upturned. Sometimes the days just blur into the nights. These words sit jumbled on the page week after week, before I offer this sneak peek. 

But through all of the chaos, there’s these delicate moments that we steal. Just when we think she will never go to sleep, she starts to drift off in his strong arms. I sit quietly by his side sipping each second in. Admiring him. Admiring her. When her little eyelids finally close, we exchange this glance that in itself speaks of that knowing. The knowing that all of these battles are worth fighting for. 

The filling of the cup

by surfchickareta, posted in achievement, adventure, childbirth, children, conscious living, dreams, exploration, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, mindfulness, nature, pregnancy, vitality, wellbeing

As intoxicating as it is, surfing will only fill your cup to a certain level. It just took me all of my teens and twenties to figure that one out. Because back then I would’ve laughed at anyone even suggesting that there might be something equally, or more fulfilling than riding waves. I was just so absolutely obsessed with surfing. That was my world as I knew it. It wasn’t until a strange little flame started to burn somewhere in the depths of my body, that I experienced fleeting thoughts of whether there was something more that life had to offer. 

When I found myself standing with my partner in the blazing Timorese sun on a surf trip a few years ago, I wasn’t dreaming about riding the perfect wave that broke outside our bungalow, but rather I visualised swaying in a nearby hammock nursing our baby and wasn’t overly fussed if I surfed or not. I guess that was the true turning point when I realised that perhaps I had milked surfing for all its worth.

Fast forward to the now, I write with our newborn daughter curled up on my chest softly snoring away in her very own dreamland.

There are many times where we each find ourselves looking back on pivotal life events where we recollect the most profound moments, particularly those that have shaped our adult lives. For me, I draw back to when I had returned from extensive overseas travel pregnancy and surfingand endured the heartache of an abortion. For a long time I battled fears that something might happen in the future that would prevent me from having children, along with a grappling thought that I would be incredibly regretful of my decision to terminate, should I somehow never have the chance to fall pregnant again. 

Ironically, not even a year after the abortion, my greatest fear had somehow manifested itself. While travelling solo, I had suffered a head injury surfing a typhoon swell in remote Phillipines. After passing out unconscious and waking with sharp pains in the area of impact, I had to fathom grim thoughts of potentially suffering from brain damage, with no medical assistance nearby, and of course thoughts of not being able to have a child.

While I eventually made a full recovery, those two events irreversibly changed the meaning of my life and my pursuits. Even though I made a full return to surfing, my confidence was stripped for years to come, while in the background, my desire to have a baby only grew stronger. That’s when something strange began to unfold. Piece by piece, surfing slowly took a backseat, until the desire faded to a completely unfathomable place. 

I truly thought that child birth would be the greatest challenge for me to overcome, but I was surprised that it still didn’t trump that one surfing accident. But don’t get me wrong, the experience of birth has still made it to the top of the list as one of my most memorable moments.

I thought I would be one of those mammas that would surf until full term, but that big accident  and many other smaller surf injuries, saw me pulling the plug only four months into pregnancy. I just wanted to keep my baby safe and cocooned, withdrawing from anything that involved the slightest degree of risk, and for the first time in my life I wasn’t permanently sporting a fin cut or bruise anywhere on my body. I couldn’t help but still ride a blow up mat for nine months, but of course the thrill just wasn’t the same. 

Now that I’m on the other side of birth, the flame that had burnt dry is now starting to reignite. My passion for surfing is starting to return and there’s no greater feeling to come out of stagnation and harness this renewed energy now that other areas of my life are complete. 

Faded desires

by surfchickareta, posted in achievement, adventure, attention, children, dreams, exploration, giving, health, healthy living, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, mindfulness, peace of mind, philosophy, soul surfing, travel, vitality, wellbeing

I wake from my afternoon nap in a panic. The late golden sun melting below the palm trees, the wind creating dancing shadows of jagged palm fronds across my turquoise bed sheet. The scent of smoke from a nearby fire drifts through the cracked window, reminding me of the many remote and tropical islands of which my younger self ventured through.

Suddenly, all of my surf trips flashed before my eyes. That was it. No more of those wild days. But then slowly, panic gives way to acceptance. A giving way that has been weaving its way throughout my mind for the past couple of years. A feeling that was certainly not always easy to grasp. 

In the very moment of exploration, I know I made the absolute most of it. I couldn’t have lapped up any more of it had I tried. Though, coming out of the other side of filling everybikini body spare moment immersed in the ocean, it’s a relief to not be 100% engrossed in it anymore. It’s a making way for something even greater. 

My cup has well and truly overflowed with fullness for all the waves I’ve been privileged enough to ride. As I write, I sit with my mug of liquorice tea, while the first of the winter swells grace the shores. My rusted bicycle recklessly leans against a tree trunk from my early morning surf check. One where many hungry surfers lined the carpark, frantically getting into their wetsuits, eager to steal even one great ride. And yet, I felt a great calmness as I cycle away, no longer having that burning desperation to be out there. 

It was only a few years ago that I would punish myself for missing even one morning surf. The times when I did surf early, I’d then need to be out there in my lunch break and again after work. A complete and utter obsession. 

Now, a mysterious anticipation lingers in my mind. An anticipation for the next chapter to come. Curiosity tends to hijack many moments throughout my day; how great it must be on the other side. It must be something pretty incredible if it’s going to be any greater than my love of surfing.

Of course, this passion for surfing is never going to vanish and it will always remain a key foundation. 

Rather, there’s some kind of interlude playing out. 

A slow burn. 

There’s no longer a fearful clutching at something that feels like it’s slipping away. In recognising the need for that interlude, alluring visions flash through my mind. A tiny hand in mine, small and clumsy steps, wide and sparkling eyes as we slowly make our way around the edge of a remote island.

Pave the path to your dreams

by surfchickareta, posted in achievement, adventure, attention, conscious living, dreams, exploration, freedom, healthy living, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, mindfulness, peace of mind, philosophy, spiritual, wealth, wellbeing

As I drove the same road to the office yet again, by the time I parked my car at work I had realised that I may as well have placed a blindfold across my eyes. I’ve become so accustomed to driving that same route for two years, that I felt I didn’t even appreciate the beauty of the ocean along the way. To me there’s nothing worse than feeling as though your life is stagnating and you’re living the same chapter day in, day out. So exactly how do you break that pattern and add colour and depth to your life again? It all begins with mindset, because you’re the one in control here.

So often you might put yourself in a holding pattern without even realising it. Being held to that job you hate, that dissatisfied relationship and a town you really never wanted to live in. We are so programmed to only notice all the ‘what is’ in our lives, and from those observations believe sometimes that ‘this is the way it will always be’. This restricts us so much in the way we dream about how we want our future to look, although we were all too good at dreaming as a child, and I think it’s kind of sad that we lose that natural abraham hicksability as we grow all old and responsible.

‘I want to win the lotto then I can travel the world and retire early’. This kind of thought probably feels pretty good to you, but almost immediately you might contradict that thought with ‘oh but that will never happen, the odds are always against me’. The thing is, the law of attraction doesn’t care about your words, only your vibration that you’re offering. It’s only ever going to bring you more of the vibration that you put out there. ‘I’ll never have enough money’ means you’ll always attract more of not enough.

Believe it as just how you want it

Recently I got a job in Byron which allows me to move in with my man after 2 years of commuting, and living a little like passing ships in the night. In hindsight, I can now see that I got so caught up in how my life has been, that it took so much longer to manifest this new job than what I was hoping.

Even though I’ve learnt so much about law of attraction over the years, I was tripping on my own conditioned mind. Like a broken record I kept repeating in my own mind ‘I hate this lifestyle, I spend so little time with him, this job is so boring’ along with bucket loads of beach girlsimpatience and frustration. Of course I only got more of that which I disliked, which held me to the same old conditions, which left no room to allow any new conditions or opportunities to come my way.

The real trick is in playing an entirely new record in your mind. Whatever it is that you see in your dream lifestyle, write down all those aspects. For me it would be something along the lines of ‘I love waking up to you every morning, I’m so glad that all that commuting is behind us, I love living here again, it’s so great to be in a small community’.

Talk about your current lifestyle that you dislike as something of the past. Humans so often need to see a physical manifestation before they can believe something. The above trick gets you ahead energetically, which allows you to rapidly reach your dreams much faster than waiting for the physical manifestation.

I guess you can kind of picture it as brainwashing yourself! Don’t be afraid to get specific, it doesn’t matter how small the detail is, as long as it feels good and you can believe it to be real. There’s no point in saying ‘I can’t wait to live together, it’s going to feel so good when…’ as that will only remind you of the way it is now, you’ve got to speak it as though it’s happening right now, not in your future.

Catch your thoughts early on

Once you’ve put all that good energy into your new life thoughts, you have to be very mindful of negative thoughts that creep into your mind. In the beginning you might havesurf girl dreaming so much pent up resistance that you have to focus incredibly hard to wipe out these painful or negative thoughts.

‘I’m so tired of working with my colleagues, we have nothing in common and I’m sick of all the office gossip’, becomes ‘I love this new job, it’s such a positive atmosphere and in a strange way I look forward to coming into work every day’. You can see how this matches your vibration so much more closely to that which you want in your life.

If you’re unsure of the progress you’re making, just try to tune in to how you’re feeling. When you play with a puppy, you feel like a little kid again, and also feel so much joy. Tap into the joy that comes with your new mindset thoughts about your dream life. If you feel rundown and flat, then your focus is likely in the wrong place and you’ve got some work to do.

Look for the evidence

The law of attraction states that your own vibration will always match up with the vibration of another. Much like a tuning fork. What you attract externally is also another great measure of where you’re at with your mind thoughts. Just take the topic of road rage. A perfect example of the law of attraction at play.

The other day I was looking to hire a steam cleaning machine to bond clean my studio. I was getting increasingly frustrated at the high costs or lack of availability in my local stores. I recall driving out of the shopping complex all fired up that I couldn’t find what I was looking for, and had concluded that I never will.

As I approached a give way sign (with perhaps a little more speed than usual), I had to spiritualwait for a passing car at the t-section. Suddenly the car slammed its brakes on in front of me, with the female driver throwing her arms up in the air, before erratically flipping the bird in my direction. She must have thought I was going to T-bone her already beat up Holden Commodore!

This couldn’t be any more perfect proof, a suburb full of rich well-to-do’s and I attract the only one feral women who wanted to unleash her anger on me. Instead of taking on that anger myself, and getting even further fired up by retaliating I just started laughing at the irony of the situation. Those that are not tuned into law of attraction, likely would’ve flipped the bird right back at her, then continued passing that anger along to other people on the road!

So don’t be one of those people that state ‘I’ll be happy when…’ You are the one in control of your life and the thoughts that are churning in your head. It only takes around 16 seconds for one thought to attract another thought of the same nature, so why not make it a positive, good feeling thought?

 

 

 

How to master your flow state and score more waves

by surfchickareta, posted in astrology, conscious living, dreams, giving, healthy living, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, mindfulness, nature, philosophy, selfless, soul surfing, spiritual, surfing, vitality, volunteering, wellbeing

Karma and energy. Could these two dominating aspects of existence have anything to do with being in the right place, at the right time, for that one perfect wave that stays in your memory for a lifetime? Of course there’s such thing as fluking, but I think that there’s something bigger at play.

I mention the point because I’ve noticed that when I sacrifice time to give back to others, I’m always rewarded with an unmistakeable magic session. I’m not saying immediately after time spent giving back, but at any near time in the future.

When I find myself scoring that session, my instinct tells me it’s because I’ve carried out surf paddlegood deeds. Of course that’s not the motivating factor behind any type of volunteering, or labours of love, to expect something in return. But it’s nice to know that someone is watching over me, and sending gifts relevant to my greatest passion. I have a feeling that Huey and other universal figures are responsible.

And what about energy? I’m sure you’ve noticed that one guy in the water that lets out an aggressive grunt, when he can’t paddle onto a wave. He’s likely carried negative energy from his day into the water, and placed high expectations of washing that frustration away. He’s also the one that hands out disposable death stares, to all the guys scoring the best waves. If you’ve tried to surf when you’re angry, you’ll know the impossibility of the task.

Of course a much more rewarding state of mind to harness, when in the line-up, is when you find yourself in the flow. On land, you’ll recognize this state by a series of events or situations, sometimes even the occurrence of miracles. You’ve probably noticed a flow state as:

  • Doors keep opening for you.
  • The multiple occurrence of events that send shivers up your spine (described as the touch of spirit).
  • Vibrant people seem to keep coming into your life- even a stranger crossing your path that captivates you with their high energy.
  • That feeling of déjà vu is rampant. I’ve heard that’s a little sign from the universe that you’re exactly where you need to be in life. That feeling that you’ve been there before shouldn’t be written off as cliché.
  • All those little coincidences that are actually meaningful synchronicities or signs (a term first coined by the great Carl Jung) and better described in “Catching the bug of synchronicity”.

Basically you attract all the best that life has to offer.ocean beauty

Just with events on land, there’s no forcing things to happen, as it starts to become unnatural. And it’s exactly the same in the water. You have to bring a special kind of mindset with you.

This is where you really start to enjoy any conditions you paddle out into.

If you’re reminding yourself how much you love to be caressed by the warm waters of a vast ocean, watching pods of dolphins frolic in the deep waters, that feeling of a moving wave under your feet, and just being there without any expectations, then you’re going to withhold a high energy through gratitude.

Comparatively if the conditions are terrible, and you haven’t managed to catch any waves at all, you might ask yourself why you even bothered to paddle out in the first place.

Instead, look through a different lens. Know that your surfing improves with every paddle stroke. Master those junky waves, so you can truly appreciate the flawless ones. womens surfingMany of the world’s top aerial surfers crave onshore conditions to improve their airs.

Even if you’re just sitting there, you might be surrounded by one of the best sunsets or a passing thunderstorm. These moments from nature can even be missed, when you’re so caught up in needing waves, or tactically keeping on the inside of another surfer.

When you drop the neediness, and the high expectations, or any expectations at all, then you’ll feel that flow state that you’re after. You’ll be rewarded in the surf when you dedicate time to others on land. Keep in mind that Huey always watches your efforts. If you drove for three hours and didn’t score. He’s watching. If you paddled out every day of the month just because your passion is that high, he sees that too. So where’s your karma and energy sitting at?

 

 

Why women were born to surf.And have babies

by surfchickareta, posted in achievement, adventure, childbirth, children, conscious living, dreams, exploration, giving, health, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, nature, philosophy, soul surfing, spiritual, surfing

I recently caught up with a pretty special lady that I met through a mutual friend out in the surf. We each shared our vastly different experiences coming back from Indo trips over the years. Let’s just say her Bali belly was of a different nature to that of a non-refrigerated plate of nasi goreng.  In fact, she’s the only women I’ve met where I’ve recognized the striking connection between surfing and childbirth. I was rather intrigued by her sophisticated transition from a lady surfer to a baby’s mamma. As we sat over lattes at her local beachside café, she gracefully caressed her now six-month old, revealing her lavish smile as she retells the most defining chapter of her life.  

And that’s where it struck me. We jokingly made mention of our cupcake baking besties and their direct experiences of childbirth, and how they differed from those that she knew as surfers. The environment is more of a rough, testosterone filled line-up, where your cute bikini doesn’t mean much in the often dog-eat-dog habitat. And no I’m not talking about the dance of male pursuing female, although I now see it reads alike. I’m actually referring to all the risk factors of surfing, and how it’s a few notches above a mild burn, off a torn oven mitt pulling out that tray of freshly baked cupcakes.

She distinctly remembers hyperventilating on her hospital bed as the nurses attemptedhealthy living to relieve her immense pain with a gas mask. Through belts of laughter, she explained how she ran for the hospital door, ripping out all of her monitors, screaming ‘I can’t do this! I’m leaving!’ as the nurses ran after her.

After realising there wasn’t any going back, and the birth was in fact happening, like right now, she managed to calm her mind, and in turn her pain, from a very different source. One that’s not available in your regular hospital medical cabinets.  She vividly sketched the surface of a calm ocean surface in her mind, breathing deep as she remembered the silky feeling of a summer’s sea caressing her arms and fingertips, as she carelessly paddled through the line-up.

In describing surfing, she explained the all too familiar burning sensation of shoulders and arms, as you desperately desire that one perfect wave. The lifetime of deep fin slashes, bruises, burning reef cuts, jelly fish stings, infections and all other aspects of surfing that seem to add a coat of armour, to what could have been a life baking cupcakes. Not that we hold anything against our cupcake baking queens.

She was of the firm view that women who surf have a higher pain threshold. But I think32204_400218545167_814411_n it’s much deeper than a physical element. Mentally we hold those magical moments out in the ocean in the forefront of our mind. Often drifting off into daydream, far away from our current reality. And I know how much of a lulling effect that has upon flashback. I think the power of the ocean continues to live within, no matter how long it’s been since your last session.

I’m sure there’s that special kinship of once developing in the wound of salty fluid yourself, and that connection to the salt water as a surfer. Something I’m yet to describe in words. As for surfing with a young baby, constantly craving mum’s presence, I’ve never seen a girl so excited to get out into the surf at any given opportunity. It just makes me smile so big. But she just knew in her heart when she was ready. That pivotal moment when she realised there was something bigger to life than just surfing. As for the link between surfing and pregnancy; does it make us invincible? As much as we like to think that, I’m sure nothing will compare to the pain and challenge, we’re just equipped with a certain set of coping mechanisms, that are as unique as our salted gills, absent in our non-aquarian counterparts.

The Progression of Gratitude

by surfchickareta, posted in astrology, conscious living, dreams, exploration, health, healthy living, life, lifestyle, love, manifestation, meditation, peace of mind, spiritual, vitality, wellbeing

Spiritual junkies will tell you that gratitude is one of the key foundations to ultimate enlightenment.  And I’m not judging them because I’m a junkie too. But what happens on those days where everything just seems to fall apart, and all of what your life is made of is seemingly crumbling before your eyes? Well you’ve simply found yourself out of alignment from where you’re supposed to be. Practicing gratitude by starting in a place that feels good, will provide a little bit of fuel to break out of your bad energy, and back into alignment with that best version of yourself.  

I don’t see any point in practicing fake gratitude. Sometimes you’re not even conscious that you’re doing it, but when you realise you are, you find it as counterproductive as no 65169_10151137360180168_400812489_ngratitude at all. “I love my job, I love my guy, I love my dog”, won’t get you anywhere if your boss keeps throwing overtime at you, your partner is finding all your triggers to frustration and your dog just pooped on the lounge room floor. The universe will simply align you with more of your dominant vibration, when your words don’t match how you feel at heart. In other words, you’ll get more of the same stuff that’s got you stuck in that point of frustration in the first place.

The universe does not care for the words you mutter; they will simply fall on deaf ears as it only cares for the energy that you vibrate.  

You want to perhaps imagine a life without your job or guy or dog. What would that picture look like? Sure you had to clean up that smelly poop from the floor, but what about when she gives you the saddest puppy dog eyes you ever saw, as you leave the house for work. Where you can see nothing but love in her eyes, and happiness in her wagging tail, when you return home from a long day in the office. Nobody said that gratitude can’t be broken down into smaller bite-size pieces. Just as many jigsaw pieces make up a finished puzzle, so too are many elements involved with each person, object or situation. It all comes down to your point of focus.

As long as you keep the bigger picture in mind. I always understood gratitude to be the cheekythought of blowing the gifts, the love, the connections, the positive circumstances and the miracles in life, so far out of proportion that it ignites an incredible wave of new energy that just overrides life’s nuances. Gratitude has a magical way of pushing away negative aspects of life from your mind. Because you know all too well how easy it is to make a mountain out of a molehill. You just have to choose what hill you want to build higher.

Practicing gratitude takes time and practice to truly nail it. To allow your vibration to match your inner muttered words about how incredible your life is, and everyone and everything that’s in it. As soon as the words and vibrations match- that’s when the magic starts to unfold.

The joys of giving

by surfchickareta, posted in giving, love, selfless, vitality, volunteering, wellbeing

I always find this intrinsic urge to help others realise the greatness of life when my own cup is full. The funny thing is that the urge to volunteer at a local nursing home, actually came when my cup was completely empty. I guess when I felt I had nothing left to give, I discovered that in fact I still did.

I often sit down for cups of tea and listen to the many joys and struggles of those nearing the end of their lives. In the struggles, the gold always seems to be in the ability to keep picking yourself up, dusting yourself off and never losing sight of your true essence. The ones that speak more of their joys over their struggles, are also the ones that never missgiving to others a bingo class, dance class or yoga for over 90’s. They have found a way to maintain a solid outlook on life. Even when their mind starts to fade against their own will or knowledge.

I still see that spark in their eyes and cheeky smiles as they play pranks in the dining room with the other residents. They make the most of what they have and are entirely satisfied with their daily rituals they have created, within the physical limitations of their fading bodies.

I listen on as they ecstatically describe in great detail the type of toast and brand of butter they have for breakfast, what time the daily paper arrives and when the nursing home bus is due for their supermarket outing. I ask whether they butter the toast right to the very edges. Their excitement builds as I fabricate my interest for gains of their happiness. I love to play this little game the most.

It’s selfless because many people would rather be out surfing, catching up with friends orvolunteering enjoying the sunshine. A lot of the time that’s me and I really have to push myself to go in there.

But it’s when those I visit are lying on their beds rugged up watching daytime TV and I knock on their doors to see their faces light up.

When the old men in dance class fight over who’s dancing with me next, while the only two elderly women in the home watch on with daggers, as if I’m cutting their grass.

When I distract them from a topic that upsets them and start talking about how beautiful the last sunset was and watch their smile return once more.

But it’s when I leave that I feel it the most.

Not only does it put everything into perspective. The true shortness of life and what is to be held dearest to the heart. But I know that when they put their heads down at night, they will be recalling all the events that made up their day. They will be content in knowing that someone cares for them enough to spend time over a cup of tea. One women I have regularly spent time with over the years, believes that my being there must be the angels watching her and karma returning to her, for all the good deeds she carried out over her lifetime.

That’s what continues to make my heart sing. “I think about you a lot, come and visit again soon won’t you?” she said upon my departure, as I received a warm hug and kiss on the cheek.

Slaying dragons- The toxic characters of our lives

by surfchickareta, posted in conscious living, dreams, French Polynesia, lifestyle, love, mindfulness, peace of mind, relationships, tahiti, travel, wellbeing

It can naturally be very easy for us to hold grudges about past relationships that have turned sour. The realisation that the person you loved so dearly, was capable of unforgivable acts can be a painful pill to swallow. And one that I’m sure we all have the joy of experiencing. At least once in this lifetime. However, with forgiveness and time, comes a much deeper understanding as to why they crossed your path, even if they left an initial trail of destruction.

Recently I wrote about a two month trip in French Polynesia (here). It was a time where I shrewdly ignored many red flags, which ultimately exposed me to some much bigger dangers. A time where my heart wasn’t ready to be handed over, but I did so anyway.

I found myself encountering some unsavoury characters, while based on a very remote island somewhere in the middle of nowhere.  Unfortunately, one of those characters had hijacked a piece of my heart, which bit by bit I took back rightful possession of. Right before abandoning him somewhere in the archipelago.

I learnt a lot about the law of attraction. Where bad guys attract, well, even badder guys. I also learnt that while paradises can exist before your eyes, living nightmares can french polynesiaco-exist in that very same space.

When these people come into your life, it can be a mind numbing experience attempting to find any feasible explanation of a reason why. Why you deserved the treatment. When you know you’re a good person that innocently just wants to find love.

‘It can’t be that hard can it?’ and ‘why me?’ can be the beginning of a series of very dangerous thought patterns that invoke victimhood. A pattern that needs to be avoided at all costs.

Why did I meet them? I learnt the hard way not to look for answers immediately, but rather to trust that an eventual realisation will come my way. Perhaps months, if not years down the track. In the meantime, you need to take advantage of an important period where you can give yourself the love that others cannot.

My big realisation came about after a certain area of my mind was tickled, while writing65169_10151137360180168_400812489_n the above article about my time in French Polynesia.

“without my involvement in a particular surf project, my dreams to travel to this part of the world, would continue to remain unfulfilled.”

It was the first time I ever really appreciated that crossing of paths. Any negative emotions that had been lying dormant, towards that particular person, was replaced with a feeling of gratitude. And it seemed to fit much more nicely with my spirit. While the dormant emotions did not pass my thoughts for a very long time, it was still a part of my heart that needed to be cleared.

And then today another realisation washed over me.

“If I never had met him, I never would be spilling these words onto this page for you to read”.

Because I would never experience what it’s like to work on my writing business from anywhere in the world. That business idea wasn’t even a possibility in my mind until he mentioned it while we were together.

My experience would be dubbed a ‘light bulb moment’ but I think we need to extract every element of cliché about it, for these thoughts hold a lot of power. I couldn’t shake my spine-tingly moment even if I tried. And the timeline for that realisation I had today? Almost two years in the making.

These are the realisations that have the potential to shape the most vibrant futures, where dreams can be fulfilled in their entirety. These moments are not mediocre events. In the end it is the destroyer of hearts that must face their own darkness.

Wild & Free

by surfchickareta, posted in adventure, dreams, exploration, girls surfing, lifestyle, mindfulness, philosophy, solo travel, soul surfing, spiritual, surfing, travel, vitality, wellbeing

Exotic solo travel. Surfing heavy waves breaking over shallow reef shelves. Nipple piercings. Tattoos. Serious injuries in remote islands. Broken relationships. Quitting jobs. Suns and moons rising over inverted oceans. These are just some of the things that come to mind, when I think of my past few years on this spinning globe called earth. Most of which mould and solidify my identity through the many lessons learnt throughout. It’s been fast paced and wild, but more and more I’ve noticed my foot easing off the accelerator and edging closer to the brakes. I’ve heard in life never to look in the rear vision mirror.

I actually forgot how old I was. I spent two birthdays in a row escaping remote islands from the clutch of shattered relationships. In a whirlwind of adrenaline to simply survive, I paid little attention to the spinning cogwheels as my numbers flipped.

On one shoulder jumps a devil screaming my name with a wicked laugh, telling me to keep running at the same pace. Embrace the adventure and keep dodging bullets. But why am I finding myself turning down opportunities to surf big waves. To risk all again and again. Risking all for perfect waves. A quote I lived and breathed with every cell of my body.

I look back on photos taken from the islands. Christ some of those waves. And that’s the cropped-10606336_10152531576460168_8204708269631415799_n.jpgthing with surfing. That ability to push through the fear and just go. Everyone that’s out there knows the possible consequences. I’ve experienced them and came so close to not remembering every day I knew before.  Cracking my head on the reef, to a degree that saw me lose consciousness the following day. My article spread pages of women’s surfing magazines because I wanted to highlight the dangers of solo travel and make it real and personal.

I spent two months at the northern tip of Thailand building this site. Bursting with

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excitement to share my surfing experiences. And I still am. But life is a journey and I want to embrace a post-travel mindset and the challenges that come with letting go of a chapter so incredibly vibrant in my heart.

I know my mum would love to read this. She was always telling me to take out life insurance as I shared stories of big waves. Near drownings, with a smirk on my face as if I just used up one more of my nine lives.  In the equally as grinning words of Gerry Lopez “I’m sure you die just a little”.